I think that comes under the category that we can't control other's behavior--only how we respond to it. Sometimes, unfortunately, there's not much you can do about it--especially if the other person doesn't or can't recognize the problems s/he's creating.

It's hard to get a new boss, and it's hard to be the new boss. Some new bosses never figure out how to negotiate those waters. Or they don't want to figure it out. It kind of feels like that's the situation that you're in. Which is a pretty stinky one. You have my sympathy.