Let me preface this with the following: I doubt we know each other, and I mostly read your post because I was following the discussion about KB's interview/cindywrites'letter on her lifejournal and was curious what you would further say about it. Having said that, I can only nod my head vigorously and agree. Your experience with fandom mirrors mine so much it's astonishing, right down to "this show is soo awesome and much better than any other" (for me it was Babylon 5, not Farscape, but the principle seems the same)and feelings for characters being influenced by how rabid their fanbase is (I'm still valiantly struggling to stay neutral about Logan Echolls). It's quite a relief to know that I'm not the only one having mixed feelings about being a fan in fandoms, and rather wanting to stay clear of them, even though I've met some awesome people there.