Okay, you asked for it.

[smg01]

Well, two of you asked for it.

As near as I can remember, this is the gist of the poll that I was devising in my dream last night. It think the genesis is that at college time I had a choice between a small college of 1500-2000 and a large university close to home. I chose the large university. A large part of the reason was that the small college was just a little smaller than my high school and I didn't think I wanted something that small. While I don't regret that choice, I do from time to time wonder about the road not taken. Hence this poll. Feel free to offer any additions or explanations you care to in the comments.

[Poll #1010503]

Comments

[aizjanika.livejournal.com]

I was accepted to a small liberal arts school out of high school, but I was only 17, so I chickened out completely and didn't go. Instead I worked for a year, and then went to a small business college. I was only six months away from graduation (two year AS degree) when I left to get married, not realizing that most of my credits wouldn't transfer. (Nowadays this college does have transferable credits, but when I went there, it didn't. It was only accredited locally or something like that. Even now, no school will take the credits in transfer.)

My plan had been to get the two-year degree so that I could get a good job, and then work my way through "real" college.

I was stupid, though. I didn't know how things worked, and had no idea that the two-year degree probably wouldn't transfer to a larger school. I assumed that any school would take all my credits. Even so, if I'd had the degree, that would have been *something* to put on job applications, I guess.

I made the decision to leave school because toolman was going to flight school and I wanted to go with him. My plan was to finish my degree here or wherever we ended up, not realizing those credits wouldn't transfer. Looking back, though, that time we had alone together while he was in flight school (and they forgot to PAY him! *g*) and we struggled and just...we had to rely only on each other, and that provided the foundation for our marriage, I think. We were already best friends, but after our time alone here together with no one else to rely on, we learned how to be a real team, and that has stood us in good stead over the past 27 years, I think. Every challenge only made us stronger after that. It's hard to say that it was a mistake to leave school then, but sometimes I wonder. *g*

Anyway, I went to the local community college after I was married, and had to start over completely as though I hadn't already spent 1 1/2 years in school, which was disheartening and annoying. I changed my major and my life plans, and as life went on, I found it difficult. We were so poor! I didn't even have a quarter for a cup of coffee in the cafeteria. I ran out of gas a couple of miles from home more than once and had no money to get more. Toolman and I would scrounge around the house looking for a couple of dollars in change so that he could walk to the gas station and get some gas to put in the car to get it home...

Yeah, those were the days. Working full-time over the summer felt good because even though we weren't rich, at least we weren't *that* poor, so I lost sight of my long-term goals (which were never very specific). I didn't want to quit my job to continue school, so I went to school only part-time after that.

I continued going to various colleges in different places we lived, but I never got a degree. I was still taking classes when lyraeinne was a baby, but I haven't since then. I was working, then homeschooling, and there wasn't time or money for such things.

If I could go back in time, I think going to the small liberal arts college would have been the best thing for me. I would have been finished with two years of college (with transferable credits) even if I ended up getting married at the same time. I also think I would have had an eye-opening and mind-opening experience at that college, which was what I needed at the time. I was so young and shy and immature and afraid, but knowing what I know, seeing my own kids grow, seeing lyraeinne and her experience, yeah...that would have been good for me, I think, and also made it easier for me to actually complete a degree later, because I'd have had a good foundation and guidance from people who knew what the heck they were doing.

Ah well... Can't change the past. hehe

And actually, great poll topic! *g*

[suzannemarie.livejournal.com]

(and they forgot to PAY him! *g*)

Goodness! Was that the government efficiency at work?

we had to rely only on each other, and that provided the foundation for our marriage, I think. We were already best friends, but after our time alone here together with no one else to rely on, we learned how to be a real team, and that has stood us in good stead over the past 27 years, I think. Every challenge only made us stronger after that. It's hard to say that it was a mistake to leave school then, but sometimes I wonder. *g*

There's something to be said for the school of life, I think. There are an awful lot of things you don't learn in any classroom.


In a lot of ways I feel like I took the easy path by staying near home and going to the public university. But, it was also definately more affordable, and I had the good fortune to graduate without any school related debt.

I honestly don't regret my decision. I got a good education and the college years were good ones. But sometimes I wish I had been a little less of an idiotic snob about school size because I can see that there would have been some real advantages to going to a smaller school. Especially for someone of my personality. If I had to do it over again, knowing what I know now I'd probably make a different choice.

I tend to think that in the long run things have a way of working out the way they're supposed to.

[aizjanika.livejournal.com]

Goodness! Was that the government efficiency at work?

Yes! This was the days before computers, and they sent his record to Alabama instead of North Carolina. He kept complaining at the office, but he was just a seaman and a student, so nobody paid attention to him. In the evaluation of his course, he wrote something like, "It would have been nice to get paid..." and when his instructor saw that, he went to bat for us and made sure we got our money. (We had no real savings, and just a little money from wedding presents, and that's what we lived on. Towards the end, it was all peanut butter sandwiches. *g*)

There's something to be said for the school of life, I think. There are an awful lot of things you don't learn in any classroom.

Exactly, and our time away together really helped us grow up and grow together. That's why I chose that I'd have gone to the liberal arts college out of high school instead. I'd have completed two years there by the time I got married, and I still could have had the same life experience after, and a head start on getting a degree.

I honestly don't regret my decision. I got a good education and the college years were good ones. But sometimes I wish I had been a little less of an idiotic snob about school size because I can see that there would have been some real advantages to going to a smaller school. Especially for someone of my personality. If I had to do it over again, knowing what I know now I'd probably make a different choice.

Exactly. I didn't now then what I know now, but I'm glad we had the time to research this for my daughter, and I think she made the right choice by going to a smaller, private liberal arts school. She's getting a fantastic education, but she's also being nurtured and encouraged to grow in all sorts of ways. At a big school, you have to have the personality to make your own opportunities, but at her school, they're teaching her *how* to find her own opportunities and make the most of them--and be supportive of others, too.

Sometimes now she wishes she'd gone somewhere else, though, but I'm still glad that she went there. I wonder how she'll feel about it years from now. :-)

[kimexclaimation.livejournal.com]

I went to big university with tens of thousands of students. It wasn't too bad. My only regret is that I didn't take more classes when I was there. I thought about minoring in English, but didn't. That totally would have helped me as a teacher. I wish I'd minored in geography or geology. That would also help me as a teacher.

Live and learn, eh?

I'll be going back to school someday....

[suzannemarie.livejournal.com]

If only we knew what we needed to know when we had the chance to learn it.

It would simple things up so much! :)

[kimexclaimation.livejournal.com]

I totally agree! Our future selves should be able to send notes back to us in college! Someone needs to invent the technology!!!

By the way, my nephew is at your school. Search for a Ron Yeager. He's far more important than I'll ever be. And a really nice guy.

[nasagrl.livejournal.com]

I didn't go to college at all after getting out of high school, I took a year off to "fart around". Later I went to community college, had babies, and got started working.

Of course, now I've completed both my Bachelor's AND Master's Degrees, and I kind of wish I had done so much earlier, as it would have sped me down my chosen career path instead of the painful gallumping I'm doing now.

On the other hand, I got to raise my kids the way I wanted to mostly, as a result of having the job I did and I got to get my employer to pay for not only my Bachelor's but also my Master's Degree. Not much bad with a free education.

[suzannemarie.livejournal.com]

It's interesting how things work out. One little decision can change how everything unfolds. Putting yourself in a position for your employer to pay for your schooling? Definitely well played. :)

[rainbow.livejournal.com]

if i could go to school and wanted too, i think i would like unschooling best or a small school next. i dont do good iwth crowds or noise because of the brain injury problems. i like quiet and not overwelming.

but i dont know what i'd want to get a degree in. i am interested in lots of stuff, but nothing that gets degreed (alternative kinds home building, specially cob, permaculture, gardening, knitting, fermenting, genealogy, riting, felting, reading. i think for me doing tsuff on my own is better, though, since i can focus on stuff more for as long as i am interested in it.

[suzannemarie.livejournal.com]

That's the neat thing about life. You can get your education all kinds of ways in all kinds of things. It doesn't have to be in a classroom. :)

[evilprettykitty.livejournal.com]

The recruiter to my school told me that my not living on campus wouldn't matter. What a line! It totally mattered...so did my working like 30 hours a week to PAY for school.

[suzannemarie.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's a totally different experience.

I was always kind of irritated by the kids that didn't have to work and got plenty of spending money from their parents. Some of them clearly had zero concept of the value of money.

[evilprettykitty.livejournal.com]

Totally! Most kids I was friends with had to work at least a little but those of us that had to work a lot totally saw things differently.

[jungleeyedgirl.livejournal.com]

I got accepted into a large, prestigious university, but they thought I could pay for it myself. Meanwhile a small, reputable college in my hometown was throwing money at me, so I went there.

I wonder sometimes if I'd sucked it up, taken the loans and gone to the other school how different things would be. But I got a fabulous education at the smaller college (the year I graduated we had 3 professors get Fulbrights, which is unheard of for a school that size).

Then I went to an enormous private university for my masters and an enormous public university for my PhD. Both of them were respected schools, but the enormity of the student population makes me feel bad for my undergraduates. All my professors in my dept. at the small college knew me. I had classes with all but one of them, and they gave me a lot of confidence because they kept telling me "Oh yes Professor B. speaks very highly of you." Also I had professors who I could just stop by their office and talk for a while, about whatever. You don't get that in a big school.

[suzannemarie.livejournal.com]

You've hit on what I now realize is one of the advantages of the smaller colleges. You can build those relations with professors. At the big schools you really don't develop relationships (not that way) with professors unless you're a star. I look at a lot of my cousins who went to smaller schools and built those relationships with professors and have those memories of a smaller student body that they know well, and I feel a little envious sometimes.

[divalicious.livejournal.com]

I went to a small womens' college... I think I would have chosen co-ed given another chance. I figured since it was part of a 5C system that I'd be co-edded ok, but you really had to make an effort to socialize on other campuses since the social scene was pretty dead on all campuses. It was a lonely 4 years, and the type of women that the college attracted tended to be the same variety, which was really boring. While the living sitch was really nice (a campus with a lot of singles) it also encouraged one to be hermit-like. Ironically, the bigger liberal arts college there with the higher reputation? I found the classes there to be easier than my college's. They also had a better system for integrating students socially... a freshmen "pod" you lived with in a suite-like setting, most pods stayed friends through senior year. But their living sitch was bad and they were putting students in cabins and unfinished basement dorms... so I never had a great compulsion to switch colleges completely, just to cross-register classes.

Then again it brought me out to LA which was part of my larger subconscious goal, so while in a lot of ways I regretted going to the school I did, most times I don't. =)

[suzannemarie.livejournal.com]

Then again it brought me out to LA which was part of my larger subconscious goal, so while in a lot of ways I regretted going to the school I did, most times I don't. =)

It's those kinds of things that make me say that things often work out the way they're supposed to. Even if we can't see it until later. :)

[divalicious.livejournal.com]

I know, right? I believe the same thing... especially watching everything fall into place so well.

I'm proud of myself for making the leap into the unknown, not knowing it would have worked out as well as it did... it even amazes me.

[aka-becker.livejournal.com]

Trenton State College (TSC - which is now TCNJ The College of New Jersey), was small in physical size but allegedly had about 15000 students there. It felt about half of that, unless you were looking for a parking spot. My sister went to Rutgers, which is a University made up of five colleges all bigger than TSC. I think TSC was the right size for me. Biggish and tiny at the same time. The whole place taking up three square blocks, maybe two. I never actually graduated, but I came close.

I didn't answer the other question. I wanted to go to a tech school to learn how to be a recording engineer but my father refused to pay for that and I had no cash and couldn't get funding as my dad owned his own business and on paper made too much money. (It all went back into the business) I applied to a couple of schools, all in NJ as my father wouldn't do out of state. I tried Livingston College (part of Rutgers) to try to be an architect. I was not accepted. I may have been accepted at Monmouth College (now University) which was at least twice as much as TSC (which itself tripled in price before I left). So TSC was my only real choice. I would have been interested in the recording engineer things and music still deeply interests me, but I'd rather not give up my experiences in my fraternity. They helped make me who I am today, and hey, I got "Becker" from them. ;)